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Taking back power after loss.
Sometimes events leave us feeling like we have no autonomy or power, particularly after we have experienced a significant loss.
We will invite you to reclaim your power by entering the circle and playing on the large Bass Drums, supported by the rest of the circle.
In this exercise we place one or two large drums with mallets in the middle of the circle.
The group start a foundation rhythm and at any stage a person can enter the circle (or you may like to
schedule people one at a time) and play on the powerful Bass Drums, asserting their power.
Post group discussion
Share with the participants how it felt to take back power in this way and be supported by the rest of the
group. What other ways could help regain the ground you lost?
DREAM CATCHER - Sharing hopes & Fears
The dream catcher was traditionally used by the Ojibway in North America to protect young children
against bad dreams (spirits) that were ever circulating in the atmosphere.
They believed also that good dreams surrounded us as well - the dream catcher caught all dreams and
sorted them, only allowing the good ones through.
In this game we share good and bad dreams, catching the bad ones before they dominate us and
welcoming the good ones.
Each person represents their own ‘dream catcher’. Play ‘Rumble Ball” (imaginary ball game).
When the ball comes your way, you have a choice to:
} Catch it - and name a fear you have for the future or
} Open your arms wide and accept it - and then name a positive dream (hope) you have for
the future
At the conclusion draw attention to any commonalities between the group members and discuss -
ensure a balance between hopes and fears.
How important is it to share your fears? How important is it to hold onto your dreams?
Understanding What We Can Control In Our Lives And What Is Beyond Our Control
An exercise exploring what we can and can’t control in our relationships, and broader lives. And the importance of focusing on those things we can influence, rather than those we cannot.
Rumble on your drum if you accept that there are some things in our lives that we can control, and some things in our lives that we have no control over.
On a whiteboard draw up four columns - over the first two place the heading ‘DRUMMING’ and over the second two ‘RELATIONSHIPS’
Then allocate one column in each of the two sections to ‘CONTROL’ and the other, ‘BEYOND CONTROL’
When we are drumming, we are in relationship with others in the drum-circle, so many parallels can be drawn between the two situations.
Questions
Rumble on your drum if you often spend time worrying about things you can’t control
Rumble on your drum if you often spend time trying to change things you can’t control
Often if we focus on the things we can control, the things we can’t control will change alongside us. Can you think of an example where changing your behaviour can change the behaviour of others? (To get respect you have to give respect etc.)
Teach the break:
WORDS I Can’t Change Everything, that’s true But I’m in charge Of the things I do
TIMING 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4DRUMMING Fl B B - O o O B B O o B B O o O B B
Layer in a rhythm - each person taking responsibility for their own rhythm and how they play it, without
trying to influence others and periodically bring in the musical-break.
Finish by saying the words and the break together.
The Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the
wisdom to know the difference, living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; taking this world as
it is and not as I would have it; etc.
− Reinhold Niebuhr
Response ability - ability to respond appropriately
A Pledge of Responsibility - A transition ritual for changing levels of maturity.
Discuss the fact that all of us have at times found ourselves acting irresponsibly and that as we age, mature and reach new degrees of independence we need to take on more responsibility towards others in our communities. It is only when we recognise this that we can change things for the better in our lives.
Note: it is important the facilitator/s play an active and equal part in this exercise.
Hand out two pieces of paper and ask people to write on one, an area where they recognise they have been irresponsible (offer some examples). On the other, they write something they pledge to do in future that follows a course of more responsible behaviour.
In the middle of the circle place a rubbish bin or similar container
Tell the group that we will play together, and at any stage they can stop and walk to the middle and place their past irresponsibility’s in the bin. Emphasise just one person at a time does this and only if they are truly committed to abandoning that behaviour.
Start by layering in a rhythm, and play together as an improvised group. When all who are likely to act on this have done so, then lower the volume and facilitate a regular count of silence into the rhythm, (stopping for 2 bars and resuming). In each gap of silence, one person at a time, (usually starting with the facilitator) will say out loud their new intention. Once all have had their turn resume drumming, lower the volume and bring to a close.
At the end ask people to sit for a minute’s silence, and reflect on their pledge.
Discuss the importance of responsibility in life generally, and how it relates to trust, social cohesion and freedom.
There are a number of affirmation exercises in the R2R resource kit where people can commit to an action or belief through the symbolism of a rhythmic phrase. Research has demonstrated how activities such as these can impact motivation and self-belief through direct changes to the neural system, in much the same way as visualisation.
Discuss the challenges of taking responsibility, Responsibility requires pivoting from blaming external factors to empowering internal forces. Discuss the connection between Responsibility & Blame and Responsibility & Trust.
What are some of the benefits of responsibility? Responsibility is important because it provides a sense of purpose, in addition to building resilience amidst adversity on an individual and societal level.
Like an addiction, sidestepping responsibility may feel good in the short-term, but leads to exponentially worse pain and suffering in the long term.
‘IF IT IS TO BE - THEN IT IS UP TO ME’ Exercise
This is an exercise that looks at behavioural change and self-responsibility
The phrase - O o O - o O, B b B - b B is practiced, which represents the theme ‘If it is to be - Then it’s up to me’. Divide the group and half call out with the Tones and the other reply on their Bass.
A flowing rhythm starts (which represents the flow of life), & the practitioner tells the group that he/she will interrupt that flow with a count-down 4,3,2,1, STOP, just like problems or challenges that surface from time to time in our own lives. To resume the flow, the group will play the break 3 times – ‘If it is to be, then its’ up to me’ (taking responsibility to find the solutions, make the right choices or seek help).
Finish by having everyone say the phrase over the top of the break.
This is an affirmation game that explores personal power or agency over one's life - many individuals in R2R sessions experience a sense of powerlessness.
Start with a discussion: How can we help people find a sense of power over their own destiny? What are some of the ways you do this for yourself and are they transferable? Can focusing on our strengths be a useful strategy. What about goal setting?
'I've got the Power' exercise
Important that prior to embarking on this game we have established that people do have different ways to assert power over their lives, through the choices they make - often attending an R2R program is one of those choices.
The group practice the two phrases:
Oo-Oo-O (I've got the power) Note this phrase has a swing to it
Fl,Fl,Fl. (Yes, you have)
Then everyone plays a foundation rhythm and at any stage anyone can play the drum phrase for I've got the power (emphasise playing it loud & proud) - when they do, it is answered by the group with the drum phrase 'Yes you have'.
Finish the exercise with everyone playing and saying the two parts together (change the word ‘you’ to ‘I’)
Affirmation games are good for embedding learning concepts: reinforced by rhythmical repetition, similar to the way we learn the letters of the alphabet or sing the team song at the end of a football game.
Sit with the Silence - In this exercise the drumming represents the noise & busyness of life and this is interspersed with periods of silence where we focus on the resonance of the chimes. In each break the length of the stillness increases.
Discuss the need in our modern lives to escape the constant pressure of information, noise and worry; to regularly find a place of stillness and rest in order balance the frenetic pace of life. To find a balance between the outer and inner life. What ideas have people got for ensuring they get that balance? How hard is it to make time for quiet reflective time - do you think it is important? What might be some of the benefits for people who do make this time?
Pass out four Tonal chimes to random people scattered evenly around the circle and number them 1 to 4 (the chimes should be in a corresponding scale)
Everyone else plays an improvised rhythm and then the facilitator calls down to stop - 4,3,2,1 Stop! On the stop the first chime sounds, at the completion of its resonance the second chime rings out etc. After the fourth chime has resonated fully the facilitator calls the rhythm back - 1,2, let’s all play.
Three more breaks as above each time getting longer
2nd break – repeat the chime sequence twice before resuming drumming
3rd break - repeat the chime sequence three times before resuming drumming
Final break - repeat the chime sequence four times and finish.
Questions: How are you feeling? Did the breaks impact the intensity of your drumming? Do you find work or school more relaxing when you are having regular periods of quiet time? How important is balance in your life
Community Drum - Layer in Your Rhythm - note this is a core exercise to assist people find their own rhythm. Swap percussion instruments for some of the drums. Each member adds their own rhythm to the mix, one at a time – emphasise using the Bass as a safety point for connection and being prepared to adapt your rhythm if it isn’t working. This exercise can be used to: Showcase the importance of diversity in enriching community; Explore the different elements required in finding harmony with others in society; Examine the issues of connection, tolerance and acceptance that provide people with a sense of belonging.
Discussion: How easy is it to connect with others if your rhythm is running fast? Can you see that timing impacts connection? If you are struggling to connect with others, how important is it to be prepared to change? What things get in the way of connection? What things might help you find a better rhythm, so that you can find harmony with other people in life generally?
This exercise is also useful as an extension for when a therapeutic program finishes - it can form the basis of an ongoing recreational fun drum program.
Often a good way to finish a session individually or as a group.
Allowing people freedom of expression and leaving in a quiet, calm & connected place
Think about the things in your life that you can be thankful for – it is easy to focus on the things that are going wrong, but equally, if not more importantly, to focus on the positive things in your life.[AQ] You can list the positives on a white-board if you like. Get one thing from each person.
Nominate a short rhythm phrase that represents all the positives in your life, and ask people to watch out for that rhythm. Play ‘Call and Response’ and whenever that rhythm comes up the individual or group must answer it with the pattern Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you ve-ry much (B - O - B - O - O o O o O).
Finish this exercise with the group saying the phrase as they play it.
I have been using this exercise recently with people who have been recovering from the impacts of natural disasters.